The Big City

I had been to London before on a holiday or two with my family, and thought it was huge and amazing, but this time it was different.

We stayed at a Hotel near the hospital, I think we went by car, I cannot really remember all the details!

I had my first appointment with the specialist, where I saw three different people, A Gynaecologist, an Endocrinologist and finally a Psychologist, I was nervous, I don’t remember the full day, but I remember parts of it. When I went for my first appointment it was still in the old building of UCLH across the road, the red brick building that seemed to have towers or something from what I remember. It is still there but not sure it is still used, the clinic is now in the newer nice part of the hospital.

I am not sure who I saw first I think it was the Gynaecologist where she discussed more about my condition and kind of filled in the gaps, also telling me about the surgery I might have to have as there is a risk of cancer. Being told there is a risk of cancer is so scary, especially when I was so young and had no proper information. Now you can just go on the internet and find peoples stories and views on the surgery but back then I couldn’t find anything! I make it sound like it was in the dark ages, but I feel the social side of this condition only started a few years later as groups started to pop up.

I next saw the Endocrinologist, who said I would need to have a blood test, to check my hormone levels, at this time I had not had lots of blood tests just one every so often, I was really scared I didn’t like them, I would always feel dizzy, I had to lie down to have them, I just was not looking forward to it.

And finally I saw the Psychologist, she asked if there was anything I needed to talk about, all I could say was No, I didn’t really know what to talk about, what to say, it was something I never expected I would go through or never knew about, I didn’t know how to react or what to think, so we left her room.

I went to have my blood test, it was such an old hospital down all these little corridors not really knowing where I was going we eventually left after I had the test and went down towards Oxford Street.

I now know the walk from Oxford Street to the Hospital and could probably even drive to the hospital without a SatNav I have got so used to it!

We walked along and my mum said I could have a top as I had a blood test. We went in Jane Norman, I chose a Pink Floral top, I wore it for quite a few years after.

I do not really remember anything else about the trip, whether we did anything else or what we did!

I kind of don’t even think we stayed in London and maybe stayed in Oxford? But that is kind of irrelevant really!

We left London and I had to try and make a decision, to have my testies removed or to keep them! That Cancer risk was really weighing on my mind and scaring me!

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